When couples first become engaged, the planning process usually starts with securing the ceremony and reception locations.  Secondly, they decide on the friends and family closest to them that they’d like to be a part of the wedding day activities.  The individuals chosen to participate in a wedding, aren’t just there to witness your marriage and show others they are nearest and dearest to you.  They have jobs to do 😉

Here’s a breakdown of the duties of each of your wedding attendants – should you choose to have these individuals in your wedding – compiled from articles in Brides Magazine ,  Real Simple and Lauren Conrad‘s site (she recently married).

Maid of Honor – According Brides Magazine and Lauren Conrad’s blog (she recently married).
  • Assists the bride with all wedding related shopping: the dress, bridesmaid dresses, accessories
  • Plans and hosts the bridal shower and bachelorette party
  • Keep a record of gifts – jot down what presents the bride receives at her shower and who gave them to her.
  • Witnesses and sign the Marriage Certificate
  • Attends the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
  • Holds the bride’s bouquet during the ceremony
  • Stays by the bride’s side at all times and oversee the bridesmaids
  • Holds onto the groom’s ring during the ceremony
  • Helps make favors and address invitations.  Drop off reception items like registry book, signing pens, seating cards, and anything not already dropped at the ceremony and/or reception venues.
  • Gives a speech and toast during the wedding reception
  • Act as point person to vendors and family the day of the wedding.  Keeps everyone on track and on schedule (and keeps stressful people & situations away from the bride)
  • Carries an emergency kit for the bride on the day of the wedding
  • Responsible for paying for her own travel, attire, and accessories
  • Gives the bride both a shower gift and wedding gift
  • Helps out however and whenever she can
  • Coordinate food/snacks for the bride and bridesmaids while all is getting ready.
  • Make sure the bridal suite is cleared out after all has gotten ready and so the bride and groom don’t return to a messy room at the end of the night.
Bridesmaids, according to Emily Post
  • Assists Maid of Honor however they can
  • Helps Maid of Honor plan and pay for the bridal shower and bachelorette party
  • Greets guests at the reception and encourage mingling
  • Purchases their own attire, transportation, and accessories
  • Attends the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
  • Assist the bride at the reception
  • Supervise flower girl and ring bearer
  • Assists the Maid of Honor in helping everyone get on the dance floor
Best Man
  • Helps the groom however he can
  • Organizes the bachelor party
  • Witnesses and signs the Marriage Certificate
  • Attends rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
  • Helps groom execute wedding -related payments; delivers prearranged payments to officiants, assistants, musicians, and singers at the ceremony
  • Coordinates the groomsmen and ushers – makes sure the groom and groomsmen are on time and properly attired to all wedding related events
  • Transports the groom to the ceremony
  • Seats the Mother of the Bride at the ceremony
  • Coordinates and instructs ushers in the correct seating of guests
  • Holds onto the bride’s ring during the ceremony
  • Helps arrange getaway car for the bride and groom
  • Gives the first speech and toast during the wedding reception
  • Dances with the bride, the mothers, the maid of honor and other single female guests.
  • Delivers wedding gifts to the newlywed’s home (although usually this gets passed onto the parents since it’s more convenient)
  • Responsible for paying for his own travel, attire, and accessories
  • Encourages guests to get on the dance floor during the reception
  • Returns groom’s wedding clothes and returns rental items.
Groomsmen
  • Assists Best Man however they can
  • Helps Best Man plan and pay for the bachelor party
  • Greets guests at the reception and encourages mingling
  • Escorts guest to their seats
  • Purchases their own attire, transportation, and accessories
  • Attends the wedding ceremony rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
  • Assists the Best Man in helping everyone get on the dance floor
  • Decorates the wedding car
Ushers
  • Attend bachelor party if there is one.
  • Contribute to ushers’ gift to the groom
  • Should be 1 usher for every fifty guests.
  • Arrives at the location early to help set up, light candles, etc.
  • Greets guests upon arrival and assist with seating
  • Should know the seating order; review special seating arrangement prior to ceremony
  • Be on hand to assist any guests who are infirm or disabled.
  • Lay the aisle runner, if one is used, before the processional
  • Passes out programs and encourages mingling
  • Remove pew ribbons, close windows, re-roll the aisle runner, retrieve any programs or articles left behind after the ceremony.
  • Coordinate the return of rental clothing with the head usher or best man
Flower Girl
  • Usually between ages 3-6yrs.
  • Goes down the aisle before the bride and her father, sprinkling flower petals in the bride’s path
  • Her parents pay for her dress and accessories
  • Attends the rehearsal, however the rehearsal dinner is optional and attendance is up to the bride and groom
Ring Bearer
  • Usually young boy between ages 3-6yrs.
  • Goes down the aisle before flower girl, carrying the wedding “rings” on a small pillow
  • His parents pay for his attire and accessories
  • Attends the rehearsal, however the rehearsal dinner is optional and attendance is up to the bride and groom

Did this list help you?  Are there any traditional duties listed that you will modify, eliminate or enhance upon.  Share with us in the comments!

-S.O.